Ruminations on Humor

And Vulgarity

When anybody scolds me or says I have “disappointed” them, as happened earlier (private emails) after I posted Kyle Dunnigan, I do on an internal check to see if I missed something. Kind of defensively, but I do it.

Words like “vulgar” came up. Had I been hacked?”

I laughed, heartily, at a clip my friend Sal sent me. That’s all that happened.

I went online to watch more of Kyle Dunnigan, and interestingly, I did not laugh a second time.

Was it because I’d been rebuked?

I think the rebukes made me wonder if he is vulgar. And if I have blind spots. Turns out, I did.

I discovered Dunnigan is friends with Sam Harris! He said so on Joe Rogan. Every clip I watched, after learning that, fell flat. How strange.

I don’t love him anymore.

I am actually against vulgar comedy but if somebody is a comic genius like, say, Dave Chappelle, it doesn’t feel like a vulgar experience. Laughter is cleansing, so when somebody really makes you laugh, well, it can be a cruel thing, for the person laughed at, sure; I’m against mockery, but I love laughter, for the basic reason that it happens without thought. You laugh or you don’t.

Kyle Dunnigan has a character he calls “Mr. Neverlaugh.” I realize my weakness, when I first heard him, is how much I love the art of impersonation. I had no idea who the butler was supposed to be. No idea. That’s why I thought it was so funny.

Sal told me Dunnigan is collaborating with Jerry Seinfeld, and that bothered me, a lot.

But Seinfeld, it must be admitted, is a comic master.

Comedy flirts with cruelty, of course. But also, it liberates from tyranny. I was told Robespierre lost power as soon as people laughed at him.

A story that’s been on my mind for some time, now I can share it.

10 years ago, in Sweden, an acquaintance, a poet , very inquisitive, asked me:

“Celia, what does it mean to you to be Jewish?”

“Judinna” was the word, and that translates to Jew-ess.

I was totally thrown. I never thought if it. Stared into the flame of the Liljeholmen’s candle.

I had no answer. Am I supposed to say “We value family,” when my father said the night our family blew up was the best night’s sleep he ever had?

(He was in jail, that night.)

I felt exposed. How come I never thought of this?

It’s now ten years later, and at last I have an answer for that Swedish poet, which I’m telling you all, instead.

Here’s my answer:

“To me, being Jewish is figuring out what’s funny, comparing notes on what’s funny, and lastly, if we find it funny, allowing it to trump offense.”

What’s off limits?

Nothing.

My father and I often spoke of whether things were funny.

He certainly never tried to teach me what was in the Torah. He didn't have access, we were on another continent—my sister and I were soft-kidnapped away from him.

(My mother was Swedish.)

Jewish humor is about the humor that emerges from the abnormal/tragic/devastating/disassociated/absurd.

Or, it’s Henny Youngman.

“How’s your wife?

Compared to what?”

Rim shot.

These short, fast lines.

Jewish humor:

My mother had to study for her conversion to Judaism to marry my father, 1958. Obviously, reform. Once the ceremony was complete, the Rabbi said to my Swedish mother:

“That’s funny, you don’t look Jewish.”

My father used to say to non Jewish friends at our various dinner tables over the years:

“Let me explain. Every Jewish holiday is the same. ‘They tried to kill is. They failed. Let’s eat.’ “

Now. That could be seen as extremely insensitive. But Jewish humor bounces off a place in the collective psyche that is desensitized, by collective trauma.

My father once sang the Horst Wessel song to Peter Duesberg, in German, when Peter and his wife Siggi were over for dinner, many years ago. Siggi went ashen, and I began to feel mortified and unable to “explain” why this was happening.

Jewish humor, anybody? Nothing’s off limits?

Peter was not upset, he laughed and sang along.

He knew the song, understandably. Yet the evening ended in mortification, for me, however subtle. We had failed.

I can’t even believe I’m telling you this. But let’s be clear, like Barack Obama says: Peter Duesberg did not initiate the song. In 2007 I would never ever publish this anecdote. But it’s 2022, and, I want it on the record. Not because it is important, but because it is absurd and unexpected.

Incongruity, said the Greeks, is at the root of all humor. So if the German starts the song—not funny. No German alive would ever, ever. But…the elderly, eccentric, language loving, loving Jewish man who just loves to sing folks songs in any language…funny? Unacceptable? Both? They answer very different questions.

a. is it comical?

b. is it inappropriate/offensive/vulgar?

They can’t be answered together.

So comedy is close to sin?

I hope not.

Then there’s this. A watershed cultural moment in American culture.

“I mean this is peak stand up comedy. Just killed it. Had me rollin and hanging on every word. He's overtaken Carlin and Pryor as number one of all time. Just genius.”

YT comment.

I agree.

I’ve watched it about five times. It’s astonishing.

And, technically, I guess, “offensive” on so many levels it crashes and burns…unless…it’s not only funny, but hilarious.

How did he do it? Is this why it feels like the woke beast is never going to hurt us again?

The line: “Kanye got in so much trouble Kyrie got in trouble,” is funny as all get out to anybody who grew up in abuse and trauma. 90% of us.

One more thing that I find to be brilliant, and comedic, is Jimmy Dore, unpacking the madness of all we are living through, with his timing and voice, his very funny “I just work here” delivery.

He’s onto them:

OK, so, I no longer think Kyle Dunnigan is a comic genius. Because I no longer think he is innocent. Because he is friends with Sam Harris—atheist princess or whatever he is. I’ve stopped laughing.

Because I don’t trust him anymore.

My father used to wince because he felt his younger brother Jerry’s comedy was “dirty,” whilst he literally never said a vulgar word, being a Southern conservative, born in 1930. Clean humor.

My uncle is very far left and we no longer speak, I’m too frightened, but he makes me laugh.

Southern Jewish humor is infinitely rich. I know he’s mocking people who I don’t think should be mocked but still, I laugh. The character’s name is “Dooley.”

My friend Jeff Schreiber wished me “Happy Apocalypse” tonight.

And I thought, “Jeff, you must be Jewish.”

(For: Mark.)